Three Drabbles
ACTING MAYOR
He is always looking to stretch himself. He equates height with status. It annoys the entire town. He can be seen dangling from rooftops with weights tied to his feet. He wraps one end of himself around a balustrade, places a rope around his other end, and loops it around a far balustrade, and back to himself. He tugs until he is exhausted. Everyone compliments him on how he has grown, even though it is obvious he hasn’t. Nonetheless, he revels in his towering accomplishments. He canvasses the citizenry for enlargement ideas. Privately, we compete to provide him the silliest.
AS USUAL
Every year there is a feast, and most of the town buys tickets. What is served varies with who that year is on the preparation committee. Whatever it is, it will be enough. From some storage bin somewhere, Council provides a dozen tables and tablecloths. All is set up in the brightest part of our town park. The night before, constables search the park thoroughly, running out any remaining homeless, clearing any hiding places of those who might scam a meal without having a ticket. Volunteers often show to help them. It is a tradition, and great fun for all.
RELIGION
Pastor Silver says it has increased youth baptisms by three hundred percent—an unheard-of figure. It is a bear to keep clean, but with results like that, it is worth my shimmying down to that last elbow, bracing myself to apply a good scrubbing. We have the only baptismal pool in town that has a corkscrew water slide. A deacon leads the children up the ladder; Pastor Silver waits waist-deep in water at the bottom. He stands back a bit as the Lord shoots those kids out with fervor. He is watchful for those attempting a second run.
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